Grad Chapter: Honest moment

Dear Inspirations,

As of December 10th 2016, I am officially done with graduate school. (Inserts a fist pump) I am free from school!! I've graduated once again and this time it was different. I remember how amazing and stress free it was to graduate for the first time. There was so much adrenaline pumping and I looked at the world as a ocean. I was ready to take the world by storm.

Fast forward four years.... I'm married, I'm a mom and I guess you could say the world feels different.

Saturday felt amazing don't get me wrong. BUT the feeling was different. I felt a sense of pride, joy and true completion. I am the first one in my family mom and dad side to go to college. I was the first one to get my bachelors and currently the only one. I was also the first one to get my masters. I'm not saying this to brag. I'm saying this because I feel extremely grateful. Undergraduate I felt like I did it for my dad and my sisters. Graduate school was for me. I started the program single, but I ended it married and with a son.
So much growth as a woman.

Time flies and life does not wait for you to get ready!

Even though I graduated Saturday.... I am yet unemployed at this exact moment. (just typing that makes me cringe)
Despite being unemployed.. I know that greater is coming. I tell myself this daily and some days are harder to believe than others.
I will be the first to say that its very hard when it seems like nothing is looking up.

I'll be real honest and say that.. the weeks leading up to graduation I felt hopeless, discouraged, and really down and out. Everyone was asking "How do you feel are you excited?" I had to fake it.
I was having a hard time looking at graduation as an accomplishment, because of my current job situation.

I was trying really hard to shake it. I was having a inner battle.  I have those moments all the time. I try really hard not to let it effect my personal life, but it does.

I'm working on that as a person.

I know in months to come things might get tough, but I also believe that God will make a way.
He always does. Some how I'm always okay.

I believe in God.

I have some amazing people in my life that don't let me beat myself up.
I have real friends in my corner rooting for me.
I have a wonderful husband and a son who loves me dearly. Not for what I have, but for who I am.
Because of those things I must go on.

I closed yet another chapter of my life.
It's time for a new one.

Only God knows what's next for me. Whatever it is I AM READY.
I'm going to focus in and get ready for my blessings.

This blog is for me as a reminder of where I am in my life. It is also for you.
If you feel like giving up... DON'T
If you feel like you aren't standing in the right place... YOU ARE
If you feel like you should stand on faith and do something else ...DO IT
If you feel like you are struggling and no one knows how you feel... I DO
If you feel like things won't get better... THEY WILL

Until next time

DearJasmineP

She's a GOAL digger

“I’m going to get my life together”.

You know there is an app for that.

No, there isn’t an app for that, but imagine if there was!

Geesh, looking at my goal list for 2016… and if I am being truthful I must say I slacked all year.

Goals are always great to have, but what’s a goal with no plan of execution?  

It’s just words with no real meaning.

Life has a funny way of making you feel like you’re not where you need to be.

 

Looking at my goal list makes me feel like I failed myself.

“Jasmine, you had 365 days to complete your goals what happen?”

Looking at it again makes me feel like I lied to myself all year.

But the truth of the matter is “Life happens”

 

I knew when I set some of those goals it would be almost impossible or very hard to complete.

Some of them were  just outlandish. “Loose 100 lbs”

I mean I know that might sound doable to some people, but for most of the year I was pregnant so.. (go figure).

 

We never think about all of the goals we did accomplish though.

One of my 2016 goals was to get married (DONE)

Move into a bigger space (DONE)

Graduate with my MPA (in the works 12.10.16)

DearJasmineP  an official doing business name (DONE)

Get closer to God (ongoing goal)

 

See I wasn’t on social media the whole year. I was out in the streets making things happen (lol)

 

Speaking of social media... I think this is the root to not completing goals.

In efforts to get my life together I am slowly going to be taking big breaks from social media. This week I deleted my Twitter app.

I replaced it with a productive app. (Water reminding app).

Social media is a silent GOAL KILLER.

Yea, I said it.

Think about how much time we spend being noisy... (I'm included).
I'm going to work on cutting back.

 

My friends and I have been talking about getting our life together for 2017!

I am with that movement man!

That’s one thing about the people in my circle they keep me inspired, motivated, and constantly laughing.

Shout to “The Girls”

 

I am going to get things in line.

 

This blog is just a small reminder that life is going to happen and sometimes it won’t be in your control.

Just because you didn’t meet all of your 2016 goals doesn’t mean you failed.

2016 taught me that in order to reach a goal one must have a TRUE plan of execution.

Not just scribbled words on a note pad. A true plan of action.

 

This one is for those goal diggers! Let’s set those goals and make it happen!

Let's hold each other accountable for making 2017 a better year.

Set goals. Make a plan. Execute. (in that order).

 

#gettingmylife2017

#goaldigging

#newlifewhodis

 

 

 

Time is priceless

Dear Inspirations, 

Time is the one thing that seems like we don't have enough of. 

How could this be true when we have 24 hours in a day? 

I ask myself am I using my time wisely? 

No. I'm guilty of using my extra time to surf social media, looking at snapchat,  to dig into the celebrity gossip, to send memes to my friends, and looking at the explore page on Instagram. 

Hey, I'm just being honest. 

Each week I'm telling myself "Jasmine you need to be more productive" but each week I fall short. 

Think about the countless hours we waste. 

Rome wasn't built in a day... but I'm sure if they were taking social media breaks in between building it would have never been built. 

Would Beyoncé and Oprah still be the same people if they weren't using their time wisely? 

This is personal but I'm sharing to remember this moment. 

I am going to do better with my time, before time runs out. After all time is priceless and once it's gone... Welp you know the rest.

How will you use your time wisely?

Until next time, 

Jasmine P. 

Because God works

Dear Inspirations, 

Why is it that when we are going through we have a hard time believing it's going to work out? 

It's not until after its worked out that we are able to relax and rejoice in what God has done for us. 

I don't want to be that person that's worried that God won't answer my prayers. In the midst of my test and in the midst of my storm I want to already be rejoicing that he has brought me out. 

I want to be so rooted in God that my faith lets me see it already worked out. 

I want it to become such a routine where I don't have to worry. 

Why can't we trust God? When our whole world is upside down, we must believe that he will fix it.

To many times as humans we sit and wonder "how am I going to make it, how will I get through this" 

Today I remind you that God has already worked it. Your life is going as planned. God has heard your cry. God has heard your prayer. No matter what the situation is.. Know that God has went ahead and answered. It's all in a matter of timing. We ask for so much and sometimes he just wants us to be patient. 

Will you believe God today? 

Will you believe that your blessing is just  on the other side of that test? 

Yes it might be hard and we might not want to go through it, but believe that it's already done! 

Happy Monday! 

The need for change

Dear Inspirations, 

"I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic, for which it stands one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all"

We recited this pledge everyday in school but now does it mean anything? 

I want to believe it still means everything. 

I want to believe that America is still the best place to live.

"The land of the free and the home of the brave" 

This is what America stands for right? 

Or at least this is what they wanted us to believe. 

Honestly, right now I'm having a hard time believing that. 

We've experienced so much crime, so many innocent people being killed and so much hate.

Why so much? Haven't we endured enough? 

I feel like we've been setback a few decades where violence was the only option. 

I feel like some are just creating a reason to shoot. 

We are experiencing so many violent killings. I'm not just talking about black lives I'm talking about all lives. 

It's sad how you can't even go to a church without the possibility of being shot. 

You can't go to the club, you can't go to the movies and you sure can't be driving around without the possibility of being shot. 

America has became a scary place to live.

It's become a war zone. 

It's become a place where there is no justice and there is no peace. 

Growing up they taught us that America was where everyone wanted to come. 

America the land of dreams.

America the place where you could be free. 

Yet today it seems as though America isn't really free at all. 

Everyone wants to make it JUST about race.

This isn't just about race, it's about everything.

It's about hate, it's about injustice, it's about everything. 

There's a serious need for change. 

There are issues that need to be addressed. 

No one wants to talk about it. 

Today I write to you in hopes that you will be apart of the change. That you will not only become  aware but also conscious of what is happening around you. That you will do something. That you will stand up and be apart of change. 

As Biggie  once said "we can't change the world unless we change ourselves" 

Until we meet again

DearJasmineP

Refusing to be Susan

Dear Inspirations,  

Today I woke up at 3AM with this burning desire to have more. 

If I’m being honest it’s not every day I wake up with this desire. 

Some days I am okay with the way the cards are. 

No, I am not saying I am okay with my life as a whole.

I’m saying that some days I just wake up and get the day done. 

However, today was different. 

I woke up with the desire to get more. 

The desire to be more.

The desire to try just a little bit harder. 

Often times we find ourselves complacent or content with our circumstances. 

I believe this is how people get stuck at a job for 30 years. 

No raise. No title change. Just stuck as “Susan sales associate”. 

Sometimes we never ask for more because we are just content with mediocre.

It’s not until something happens that sparks a fire in our heart. 

For example, if you’re working and your pay is fairly decent, you’re able to pay your bills and you can take your family vacations would you be as eager to ask for a salary increase? 

Most of the time no.

But, if all of a sudden your rent is increased by 20% and you have to pay for school out of pocket the need for a salary increase changes. 

Sometimes we just need to ask for more before it gets to that. 

Today  I woke up with the desire for more. 

I get it, it’s tough to ask for more. 

I will even go out on a limb and say it’s tough to get your foot in the door let alone be able to ask for more. 

TRUST me I know. I’ve been there. No, I’m still there.

So then what do you do? 

Well, you continue pressing. You continue applying. You continue asking. 

You don’t forget about what you really want, better yet you don’t forget what you deserve! 

I don’t want to wake up and realize that 30 years passed me by and I was still “Susan sales associate”

We see them all the time. We work with them. They are our family. These people are our friends.

Now wait I am not saying anything is wrong with that. I’m simply saying that’s not the life I want. 

We often wait and wait for the right time. 

We often wait for the promotion to knock on our door. 

I’m saying don’t wait. 

I’m saying don’t just sit there and hope they change your title. 

Nope. 

Ask. 

Apply. 

Go for it. 

You are the only competition. 

I know it’s discouraging and I know it’s hard. 

But guess what? If anyone is capable it’s you. 

You’ve been through so much. You always rise to the top. 

Who doesn’t deserve more? 

Seriously, how come celebrities continue to be a part of commercials and endorsements? 

For more! 

How did  the Kardashians become a household name? 

Because they didn’t stop, they ran with the small window of opportunity and became moguls. 

They kept asking for more. If there wasn't a door they made one.

So I’ll simply ask.

What’s stopping you? 

Until we meet again, 

DearJasmineP

Baby chronicles

Dear Inspirations, 

Today I write from a soft place in my heart. I'm 25 weeks pregnant! Yup! That's what I said. Lol. In the beginning I was hoping that this was some type of prank. You ever have moments when you feel like your on Punk'd? Well that's how I initially felt. 

The news hit me about two weeks before my 26 birthday. I had plans of turning up. I mean I wasn't planning a huge party or anything, but I had plans to forget my name for my birthday. (Ok may be not all of that). Anywho there I was 6 pregnancy sticks later still thinking, what a sick joke this was. 

I think sharing it with my fiancé and friends made it all sorta surreal. The thing that sealed the deal was that first doctors visit. They wanted to know how I was feeling and why did I think I was pregnant. I was tired, but I'm always tired you know. 

So, in the doctors room we waited.  I was scared like a 12 year old getting ready for a high school physical in the gym behind that little curtain. 

I wanted to know if it was really true.. Me a mom? No way? How? When? Now? The emotions I felt were so crazy. 

Welp, "looks like your about 10 weeks pregnant" he was saying more but I think I mentally left the room. 

I could have fainted because now it was really real. I was really pregnant. I sat there with Addy and we laughed. I was laughing to keep from crying. He was probably laughing because he was happy. Now don't get me wrong kids are a true blessing and I've always pictured myself being a mom one day.

You know I saw my kids running in the back yard and me being a PTO mom but I never saw me actually carrying the kid in my stomach.  You know I saw my house and white fence and my account on overload (currently far from it). I saw this though. 

Call me crazy but I saw my life in snippets all the time and it never crossed my mind that I would be wobbling around. 

Coincidently, it seems like everyone around me is pregnant my best friend, my old roommate in Maryland, all of my fb friends, and my grad school buddy. It's in the water they said. I wasn't drinking water sooo how did this happen? 

We all know. Moving on. 

I was scared to tell people what would they think? She not married. I was two semester away from my Masters degree. 

Humph.. There's more i'm sure they probably said but I'll never know. 

I feel like I conquered so much in 26 years, but I never knew I would be someone's mom. 

25 weeks later I know that I'm not on Punk'd. 

About 5 years ago I secretly decided that whatever God has for me is literally for me. I accepted that.  So how could I not walk in his purpose of being a mom?  

I just hope I can be a good mom. 

I just hope my kid doesn't make me go crazy with the many first we will have. 

I pray that I'm still able to do all of the things on my list. Like change the world. 

This blog is for me. For me to remember how I felt. I cry sometimes. I laugh sometimes. I'm in pain often. I hate the sight of stairs. I'm out of breath sometimes.  Those bathroom trips are about to kill me. My baby kicks me like he's angry. I need a new back. Some days are really tough but...

I'm ok with that. 

I'm embracing it. 

I love the woman I'm becoming. 

I'm going to be someones mom. 

Love Jasmine P. 

Chapter 2 of 12

Dear inspirations, 

I started out with the plan of being a travel blogger. I was going to document my adventures and share my sights right here. 

Well I don't know if you notice but I haven't been traveling. Partially because life has kind of took over. Don't get my wrong I'm enjoying the ride but I feel bad that my original purpose isn't being fufilled. 

I'm in debate daily about if I'm going to continue writing or if my life is even as interesting. As I type these lines It's kind of weird to even think that might life was ever interesting. 

Have you ever been disappointed with yourself because your original plan failed? Well that's how it's been for me. I've had all these great plans and it's not that they really failed it's more of their just taking longer than I mapped out in my brain. 

That happens. 

Today I write to honestly share my truth. My only truth is that I've been procrastinating, lazy and slightly busy but busy with what? I'll just say life. 

I want to do better. I will do better. 

My life isn't to interesting, but I still like to be able to read it back and smile from my growth through words. So here's to chapter 2 of 12. 

Thank you to Shadana for inspiring me. 

Love, DearJasmineP